And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
love makes seman taste better
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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