I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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