I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
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