Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
