I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize
