it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
i believe in u and ur pee
I came so hard my ears popped.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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