If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
