we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
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