If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
