saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Randomize
