what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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