Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
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