Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
