I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
