wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
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