My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
They are going to name an STD after you.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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