Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
