so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
When are your genitals available?
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize
