This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
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There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
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Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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