i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
