Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
