i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
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