Texts From Last Night

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  (989): View more from Michigan

  Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.

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  (989): Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother. http://tfl.nu/be9n
  Replies (86) Good night (4152) Bad night (7760)
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  (951): View more from California

  Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".

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  (951): Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try". http://tfl.nu/107g
  Replies (16) Good night (1025) Bad night (5851)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory

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  (541): we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory http://tfl.nu/4fuz
  Replies (59) Good night (5596) Bad night (1123)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers

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  (617): i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers http://tfl.nu/ovgd
  Replies (23) Good night (1073) Bad night (4815)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.

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  (256): My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred. http://tfl.nu/j0t5
  Replies (18) Good night (4061) Bad night (1139)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.

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  (913): season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown. http://tfl.nu/f9w7
  Replies (33) Good night (4828) Bad night (1068)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?

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  (267): how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch? http://tfl.nu/7fe5
  Replies (16) Good night (5202) Bad night (1221)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth

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  (405): I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth http://tfl.nu/n9x2
  Replies (9) Good night (927) Bad night (3869)
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.

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  (518): I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk. http://tfl.nu/wd6k
  Replies (3) Good night (1747) Bad night (612)
• Favorite

  (514): View more from Quebec

  She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self

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  (514): She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self http://tfl.nu/l5li
  Replies (3) Good night (869) Bad night (700)
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?

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  (810): Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july? http://tfl.nu/yisd
  Replies (6) Good night (1391) Bad night (602)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.

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  (248): sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom. http://tfl.nu/qeu4
  Replies (4) Good night (915) Bad night (422)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME

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  (619): i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME http://tfl.nu/1892
  Replies (4) Good night (603) Bad night (344)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor

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  (716): I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor http://tfl.nu/okrw
  Replies (0) Good night (279) Bad night (453)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.

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  (785): Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting. http://tfl.nu/n8lw
  Replies (3) Good night (266) Bad night (713)

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