Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
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