Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
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