You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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