Having a random hookup so left but love u
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
