And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
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I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
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Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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