Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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