she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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