I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
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