I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize