shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
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I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
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I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
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