I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
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