are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
Randomize
