Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
