The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I won't apologize to a one balled man
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
