in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
