doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
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At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
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There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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