I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
