I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
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