yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
