she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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