what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Randomize
