Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
