You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
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