I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
