Im at strip club and am horny
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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