I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
