Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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