Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
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